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Is Viewing Pornography A Form Of Adultery?
By Jelena Leger
Is viewing pornography a form of adultery? Many would say that it is not since there is no physical contact with another person involved. On the other hand, ask any wife who has caught her husband viewing porn and she will probably say that it is! Men and women both view and can become addicted to pornography, but men are far more likely to become ensnared in this trap. Marriages have been destroyed by this type of infidelity because of a loss of intimacy, trust and eventually love.

Viewing pornography can destroy trust between a husband and wife. When a wife discovers that her husband is involved in pornography, it can be a slap in the face to her self confidence. Women tend immediately to blame themselves or feel that they don't measure up. Then the wife begins to wonder if her husband has had a physical affair. The sad part is that when men are caught, they often become defensive and lie which destroys the trust even more. The wife may fish for details and he may lie altogether or either give her just enough information to make her wonder even more. Even though it is a natural response for the husband to try to cover up this horrible sin out of shame, the lies and/or unwillingness to tell his wife any details destroys her security and trust in the relationship.


Viewing pornography can destroy intimacy in a marriage. Men tend to be very visual when it comes to sexuality and less emotional than women. is usually how men define intimacy. Women find intimacy in talking, hugging and emotional stimulation.

These differences are like a double edged sword wreaking havoc on intimacy when the husband is engaged in porn. He becomes more distant as he spends more time on a computer either in a locked room at home or at work. He wants to talk to his wife less out of guilt and eventually may start to have temper tantrums. His wife becomes starved for intimacy because he is so distant. He no longer desires intimacy with her because he falsely feels like he's getting all he needs from pictures and movies.

Viewing pornography may eventually destroy love. Most men don't feel that looking at videos or pictures of naked women is a form of adultery. They feel that as long as they don't go have with a woman that they are okay and they aren't hurting anyone. That couldn't be further from the truth. Husbands tend to become distant from their families and anger easily. Children can get caught in the middle when they see dad's temper tantrum after mom asks a simple question. The wife may try to explain how badly his habit hurts her but if he can't see it, he blames her and becomes even more defensive. After enough time, she may love him less and less and if there's no change, the marriage may end in divorce.

Pornography can have the same effects on a marriage as a physical affair. The loss of trust and intimacy can eventually lead to divorce. It is a rampant problem and until more husbands realize how badly they are hurting their families and themselves, it will continue to be. Therefore, viewing pornography is a form of adultery.
Jelena Leger is married with four children. She knows the pain of infidelity. She also knows that healing is a journey for both spouses and love is a very powerful thing! Visit her blog for hurting spouses

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